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Solidshoes Final Review
By solidshoe
Night at the fanfics-Final Edition
Hi, Solidshoe here. Just want to say bye to all the cool peeps on Dansjp3page. In the short time that I
wrote the reviews (three weeks I think), I got to read some very good stories, and all I can say is I
appreciate being given the opportunity :P For the not-so cool, childish members...bah...I won’t waste words
on you guys....:D
Anyway, here are the last of my reviews. Again, if I missed anybody, sorry. If you read what’s below and
you come away feeling like I’m an ass...tough luck...since I’m leaving, guess you’ll have to suck it up :O No
more venting to Solidshoe :D
Anyway, I’ll shut up and let you read what you came to read. Bye.
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Jurassic Park - Open Day
by Zap Madrigal
“I’ve been through so much, when I was a kid and got back from the island....”
I’ll get right to the point on this one. It reeks of skill. For those who don’t comprehend what I mean, I’ll
break it down in simpler terms: This is an expertly written fanfic with some VERY impressive dialogue,
character development, and a great premise. I’ll admit, it SOUNDS hoaky...without giving the plot away,
I’ll just tell you that it involves the four surviving children of Jurassic Park: Eric, Kelly, Tim, Lex . If that
seems like enough to turn you away, I’d have to say you’d be doing Zap, as well as yourself, a grave
injustice. The writing is simply superb. During some scenes, where it would have bombed in wrong hands,
Zap somehow manages to keep you reading, simply because of the effort he puts into the chapters. I
seriously hope OPEN DAY continues, because it’s incredibly written. Any slight flaws in the plot are
covered up with flawless interaction between characters. A damn fine start to what should be a great story.
9.5 out of 10 *******FanFic Pimp award goes to Zap Madrigal, simply because he can actually make
stupid characters seem worth while.
Malcolm Effect: Jurassic Park 3
by Vito Harry
“C’mon…everyone duck down quietly. Don’t make a sound.”
Do you like Ian Malcolm? Do you hate Ian Malcolm? Do you just not give a shit? While I fall into the
third category (with regards to Malcolm), I happen to like Vito Hardy. He hasn’t always had it easy being a
fanfic writer. So when I saw his work, I decided to give he another go. I’ll be honest....Grant’s new
nightmare was a little too...ordinary for me...it wasn’t bad...but it didn’t leave me feeling like my girlfriend
had just ****** me for ten hours straight either, which is how I want to feel after reading a fanfic...ok
maybe not...but it was just too much like ‘basic’ JP.
Malcolm Effect stands up a little better. Is reading it better than sex? Nope :O Is it a good fanfic? Yes and no. Yes in that there is no shortage of action, characterization, dino beatings (a dinosaur gets kicked in eye if I remember correctly), etc....it has all that good stuff that a JP fic needs. However, I can’t stand the play\screenplay approach to writing. I like details...descriptions....I want to envision the surrounding so I
can feel like I am there with the characters. The detail is seriously lacking in this story, even for a play\script
style story. I know what I am supposed to be seeing, but at the same time, there is almost no mental candy.
It’s like a vacuum cleaner came through and pulled all of the meat away, leaving only dialogue and a few
paragraphs here and there about plot twists. Good work, but could certainly be better, given that the plot
isn’t leaps and bounds over any other fic. More detail Vito, MORE is always better (like sex :P).
6.0 cause I hate plays! Otherwise, a 6.5 for now, and if the detail is added, easily a 7.5. This thing is bare!
Our state of mind- A poem by Seth Rex
by Seth Rex
“You’re shitting me, right?”
A poem....I like poems...lord knows I probably written a few thousand, if not more. But how does one go
about approaching a poem posted on a site where the norm consists of people being eaten alive, necks being
torn apart, din’s fighting for supremacy...if anything, Seth set himself up to look like a monumental Jack Ass
(something he’s QUITE good at on the message board, where he usually succeeds). So before reading this,
I had to wonder “why”? I have to applaud Seth for being unique, and trying something different....but does
it work?
“The things we do depend on the things we say.
The things we say depend on the things we think.
The things we think depend on what's on our mind.
what's on our mind depends on what others say.
what others say depends on our actions.
our actions depend on our situation.
our situation depends on our reasoning.
our reasoning depends on our point of origin.
our origin comes when time begins.
so it has been written, so it shall be done.
Thank you.”
Disregarding the fact that the beginning of the poem would have been much smoother had some of those
“things” been replaced with more descriptive words, and that the last line comes right out the bible, I have to
say that this is a very good poem. While it may look a little ordinary to the untrained eye, just kinda look at
what the words say. This poem has a good balance of simplicity to depth ratio. It won’t take a Einstien to
understand what it means, but at the same times, its not something that a little fat kid would spout on
Barney. It’s different, and certainly unique for this page, but it’s a good poem. And I guess that’s all I have
to say about that :O
15 out of 10 for having the balls to be different. 8 out of 10 for the actual poem.
JURASSIC PARK 4 UTOPIC TRAILER
by Red Spitter
“you won't regret, I think it's really good”
Ahhh, another trailer....again, trailers are simple. Either they work, or they don’t. There are no varying
degrees. If your trailer sucks, who’ll give a crap about the actual story? But if you trailer is good...whoa, it
makes all the difference (if you’re an aspiring writer...the more popular authors can post the word T.U.R.D
followed by the term “trailer” and people will say it’s cool regardless, but I digress...). Before going into
this one, I had to ask myself “Is Jurassic Park 4 Utopic” a GOOD name for a fan fic....well, here’s what I
thought about the trailer.
I was great! As a trailer advertising a prequel to the first JP, I was totally feeling the narrator, and the
camera shots were used appropriately. However....there’s always a however......much of the reason the
trailer works, is simply because many of the best parts are just ripped out of the first novel. So if you never
read JP, some of this stuff might seem cool as hell, but in reality, little of the actual trailer seems original.
Still, I liked it, and while it wasn’t perfect, I can say I’m ready to see what ‘UTOPIC” is all about (It better
not be a shameless rip off of the first book...).
7.0 out of 10 -minus points for originality
Mars:The Life Before Trailer
by jester Pocus
“Total Recall...Ghost of Mars...Red Planet....”
This trailer works for one reason...it doesn’t show you much. Instead of going completely overboard and
basically mapping out the fanfic, Pocus tells us just enough to get our imaginations working. I came away
feeling like I just read a trailer on the next Final Fantasy movie, and that ain’t a bad way to feel. The images
and the narration were implemented well, and I really want to read this story :D Spaceships, bad cops,
love...sounds good to me.
Basic, but it works, and that’s all you can really ask of any trailer... 8 out 10
Creation Trailer
by dark Hunter
“Is it possible to have three ‘good’ trailers in a row?”
If only the fates would allow....sadly, Dark Hunter’s trailer is a bit lacking. The narration is OK. Even the
hinted plot seems kinda cool (aquatic killer from the past). What makes this a bad trailer is the downright
hoaky dialogue between the scripted actors. I don’t want to get into it, as most of you have probably read it
already, or will sooner or later, but some of the speech is just silly for a trailer. It totally ruins any suspense
that the trailer might have. Take out some of those silly lines, and you’ve got yourself a quality trailer.
5 out of 10....a VERY average trailer that could have been better if not for some unintentional silliness.
Creationist's Theory Prologue
by raptormanD
"Have no fear, Ruso, my friend. The Father is all-powerful”
Ok, for a prolouge, it’s mighty short. Not even half a page. What’s there is interesting, but honestly, if the
author can’t be persuaded to add a bit more to one of more important parts of any story, I can’t be
persuaded to give this piece of a piece of a piece of a page a rating. Sad, because what’s there is actually
good. Not nearly enough though. The later chapters better be longer.
no rating******
Human Nature - Chapter 1
MegladonLives!
“ get Rico on the line, this is an emergency...”
Resident Mod ML takes a break from his strenuous job to deliver the first chapter of one of his two fan-fics
(making my life harder....argggggg)...Well, Human nature is first.
Opening with a very nice altered pic of the JP logo, Human Nature chapter one, is pretty much what you’d
expect from a guy like ML (witty, knowledgeable, arrogant....heheh). It’s pretty much flawless in delivery,
it’s intriguing, the dialogue is decent, and the descriptions are, in a word, FANTASTIC! For being the first
chapter, there is mucho detail, and unlike some writers who just throw a ton of detail into the story without
knowing how to use it, ML uses his first chapter to paint a pretty picture with PERSONALITY! Are there
any flaws? Not big enough to bring it down...which is a bit scary considering this is only chapter 1.
However, if you know anything about ML’s personality and style, it’s honestly hard to say you’d be
surprised. He just knows what fuck he’s doing :D Good shit man.
Upstaging bastard of the week award goes to MegladonLives!, who just made every fan fic writers life a
little bit harder. Talk about fucking up the curve for everyone else....10 out of 10...and this chapter bloody
well deserves it!
I will NOT be reviewing his ‘other’ chapter 1. It wouldn’t really be fair to the other people.....
Jurassic Park IV: Extinction
by Mr. Goodbytes
“When was the first attack?”
I reviewed a chapter of this story already, so I won’t be giving this chap a second rating, but what I will say,
is that I’m glad Mr. Goodbytes got out of his “Dragnet” rhythm. The storytelling is far less robotic than in
day one, and the actual story telling quality is just as good as it was when I reviewed the beginning of the
story.
I do have some questions about the splitting up of the chapters. It’s kind of aggravating to have to
read three separate posts to make up one chapter. While that doesn’t speak on the actual writing quality, I
think it’s a hindrance to the reader. Why not just finish an entire chapter, THEN post it, instead of splitting
each chapter up into 3 parts? I don’t get it. Otherwise, a good story. MR. Good, I urge you, stop fluzting
around and push this story to the next level already.
You’re RIGHT there...one more step man...stop
hanging back....
EXTINCTION : JURASSIC PARK
by JurassiClaw
“It continues...”
First off, why the hell are there still two fan fics running around with the EXACT same name? Yes, one is a
script, and one is story, but still...bah....it’s just laziness I tell ya....laziness.... OK, this one is the “Script”.
Earlier, I said that the introduction to this bad boy was more or less on the same level as anything the big
boys had put out (Joe and Speil). That was about a week ago. Since then, some things come to mind. Is
this ever going to be finished? Will it maintain the level of quality that it started out with? Will I get a
headache from reading this thing?
Fearing for my life, I continued reading......
Me likey very much....:D While I openly admit to hating scripts, I have to say, this one is good. It helps
that it’s not formatted Exactly like a brain numbing script is, so that’s a load off my dome. I like the
dialogue. I like the scenes. I like, like, like. I can totally see this as a movie, which says volumes for how
effective this is. One thing scares though....is the finale going to be good....Jp3 showed that a JP film with a
bad ending is no-no. I certainly don’t want to see that again, much less read it. If JC can script a grand
finale; if he can give us closure this time around, then I would gladly bestow upon his story the great rating
that it is slowly showing it deserves. If he doesn’t finish it.....lets just say he better finish, cause I’d hate to
think I read all this for nothing.....
Return to Jurassic Park: Jurassic Park 4
by DinosaurMan
“He dared to write it, I dared to read it”
God, this was a most excruciating task. There are so many things wrong with this story as far as a person’s
tolerance level goes. I simply can’t imagine anybody sitting around long enough to read this monster of a
story. Even I, master of the long drawn out chapter, almost turned away from this thing. It just looks so
jumbled and incoherent that you HAVE to prepare yourself for the worst. There is NO formatting going on
here, and it’s a pain to read. If you even look away from the screen one time, you WILL loose your place,
and probably log on to the next story.
Still, I stayed the course, read this ‘thing’, and conquered the beast that is “Return to Jurassic Park”.
How do I feel about the actual story, given that it took me so long to read it? For what the author puts you
through, I can’t say it’s worth it at all. The fact that the story starts off “It was the night before prom
night”was more than enough to try my patience. Yet I read on, and on, and on......and by the time I got to
the words “The End”, I felt as though I’d just finished viewing a Grade B dinosaur film fest. This story
screams “don’t read me” from the start, and it doesn’t help that it starts off a melodrama, turns into
Carnosaur about halfway through, then morphs into JP3, before stealing JP3’s ending. If ever there was a
story that screamed “cut me up into little pieces”, this is it. Simply put, this shouldn’t have been written.
DinosaurMan, please don’t put me through anything like this again. Hit the return key bro, it’s there for a
reason.....
Return to Jurassic Park receives my Sympathy Award....because I sympathize with anyone who goes
through what I did to review this....1 out of 10
Jurassicpark 4 The DNA search Cp.1
by dinogod65
“bah”
Another that’s way tooooo short to even be considered for anything. Also, this thing was updated Four
times, and, for the love of god, I can’t understand why.
no ratining****
Sharkey's Bad Post Day-prologue
by Dac
“Dac’s alter-ego gets a story all his own”
Ok, I haven’t had the opportunity to try out Conker’s Bad Fur Day, so all of this is new to me. Now, even
though I haven’t played the game, it’s obvious that Dac is just replaying the game scene for scene and
changing a few things here and there, mostly names. So, for someone who knows Conker’s in and out, I’d
say don’t waste your time, unless Dac does change some major things around. Now for the reader who
hasn’t experienced the mad-cap antics of the drunken squirrel, I’d say read, simply because Conker’s is
supposed to have one of the more “interesting’ storylines in game history. So, while this is probably a huge
spoiler, it’s cool, cause many of us will never play this game (I can’t see myself Downgrading from Ps2 to
play this game). So, it’s interesting, and I wanna see what Conker....errr, Sharky has in store for him.
As far as originality is concerned......yeah right. Dac’s replaying a game for Christ sake; there is NO
originality here whats-so-ever. At least many of the LoTR spoofs have totally different settings. This is just
a rip-off. A good natured rip, but a rip all the same. I’d rather see Dac use his time to right something he
made up himself, but what are you gonna do? I’ll keep reading, but only cause I wanna see what Conker
was like, not because this is good shit.
5.5 out of 10
Biosyn's Creation
by Carnotaur 3
“NO! DON’T YOU DARE HURT HER!”
Carnotaur3, AKA ‘the cheese factor’, is a cool guy. He’s lighthearted, good natured, funny, and you can
tell from talking to him, that he sets out to please. This is also evident in his writing. I’ve said it a million
times already, but I guess I gotta say it again :P When it comes to flat out entertaining writing with no fluff
or over exaggerations, you can’t beat a Carnotaur story. Since reviewing a chapter of his JP 4 story, I been
privy to his direct and to the point style. Carnotaur just tells you what he wants you see; he doesn’t white
wash his scenes or settings. His dialogue is effective. His imagery is fun. Reading a Carnotaur story has
been, at least for me, all smiles, so he’s doing something right :D I’d watch this guy if I were you. When he
finally makes the transition from happy go-lucky writer to serious writer, it should be good. Don’t know
how long that’ll take, but the skill is there. Just give the kid time to mature.
Tongue- in- Cheek Story Award goes to Carnotaur3 for Biosyns Creation and JP4 Evolution. Way to go
C3. Good luck man.
I C E T E R I A
by CarnaRaptor
"B-b-But....H-h-How....Damn"
Well, it’s only fair that I review Carna’s ICET before closing. ICET seems to be in line as the next hype
machine, and while I’d be lying if I said it’s the best story on the site now, I will say that it is easily the most
improved. Things were looking a bit shaky for Carna after chap 1 and 2 (steamy sex and lame
teacher-student argument). However, by chapter 4, the story is rolling, and it’s a shocker.
This story is shaping up to be one of the best. And while it’s not the best at the moment, if Carna keeps
improving his writing at the rate he’s going now, I’d have to tell people like AlanGrant5 and Megladonlives!
to watch their back. CarnaRatpor’s only going to get better (unless he lets people pump up his head to the
point where he starts slacking off). Cheers Carna, didn’t think you had what it took, but you proved me
wrong, and in only 2 chapters :D I’m happy for ya. Hope your upcoming months at Dan’s page are good,
cause you’re earning it.
Quick reviews:
Alangrant5’s Genesis: The most complete story at the moment. You owe it to yourself to read this.
Vadar’s Leviathans: Another story that everyone should read. While I don’t think it’s as
good as some make it out to be (no fault of vadar’s), I will say that any upcoming fanfic writer should read
this, as it is pretty much what most of you guys are striving for.
P R O J E C T S E N T I E N T by Parasaur.W: A great story that is much different from
most of the stories not his site. Having read more it, I can say without pause that this is great stuff.
Well that’s it for the reviews. Again, If I missed you, sorry. This is the last thing I’ll ever contribute to
Dan’s page, so from here on in, it’s just adios. I’ll still swing around to read the fanfics, but as for reviews
and fics, I’m through with it (at least on this site :D) Anyway, it’s been cool.
Just want to acknowledge a few people before I go....
Alexandra: My number one fan BEFORE I quit Revelations....she can’t stand me now :(
Tim: Hey Tim, I’m still on the look-out for your fic man. When’s it coming?=Probably my most
appreciative fan. This guy is cool beans..
Carnotaur3=For all the smiles....
Alangrant3=Once again, for giving my story a chance when nobody but Tim would....You are a kick-ass
writer, and easily the best on the site right now....watch out though, Megladonlives! looks hungry....
Dino_Dude=lol, you probably think I’m crazy for mentioning this guy, who many people know I can’t
STAND, but I gotta admit, he pissed me off to the point where I HAD to step up my work, so he was good
for something.....
Dan=For hosting this site. Dan, you’re the man, you know this....yet I’ll state it again...Dan is RAW
GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR!
1/23/02 2:11:32 AM
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