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Jurassic Park the Video Game Part 2
By Mr. Chaos
First Download
O% **__________________________________________ 100%
“Ya’ll just skip reading the manual and just put in the disk”
-Link
Almost Paradise
Tony Hawk whistled cheerfully as he and his crew skated down the dirty road. It was a beautiful morning. The road was full of junk to jump and dodge the perfect Skate Park.
Tony, a guy how had sold his soul so a video game could be made of him, had come to Costa Rica with his crew to find so good weed, uh, I mean skate parks.
“Hey Tony, you sure that this is a good road?” Halo asked (treasure this moment that’s the last x-box character you will see.)
“Sure dude, no cops, no law to stop us from toasting!”
They finally made it to the bench. They pulled out their bongs and pipes and stared at the sky.
On guy, a little thing named Mallow, decided to go look for some better grass, and went looking alone.
Mallow walked up to a palm tree, looking for the good stuff. That’s when he noticed a small lizard. IT was red, with a flame on its tail and a stupid grin on its face.
“Hello little lizard, I’m Mallow the frog, so you and me have something in common.”
He reached out his hand, and the little lizard ran up his arm, stopped, then ran towards his backside.
“Dude, that cloud looks like a cloud.” one of the Zora stoners said
“Dude, I hear screaming.” Tony said
“That guys trippin.” The Zora said.
Pantarrenas
“I think that should do it.” Dr. Falcon said as he finished taping up mallow. Tony stood by nervously; hoping the little stupid ball of fluff would be all right.
When Tony had reached Mallow, 20 minutes after first hearing the screams (You try running while stoned), he had found Mallow screaming, fluff all over the place and a big bite in his ass.
“So, is the little dude ok?” The Zora asked.
“Yea, I did a little falcon punch to shut him up, then stitched up his ass good.” Dr. Captain Falcon said.
“The bites.”
“There alright, but there was some burning around the area.”
“I told him not to go out with that chick Maria from Liberty City.”
“No, No, the lizard burned him.”
“So what was it?”
“We don’t know, we looked at the picture, but aren’t for sure. We asked Dr. Medabee (Medabots AX: Game Boy Advance, 34.95 at any Wal-Mart, wink wink) to talk to you.
“Ticka Ticka, WHY ARE YOU TAlKIN ABOUT BE BEHIND MY BACK!”
“Tony Hawk, Dr. Medabee thinks that mallow is fine, yet wants to talk to Mallow about the attack.”
“Ok”
Dr. Medabee walked up to mallow, “Mallow, I’m Dr. Medabee, and I would like to ask you, how big was the thing that attacked you?”
“Oh about a foot.”
Dr. Medabee walked out. “I think it’s just a Charmander, though it is a small one. Mallow will do fine, now get out of here crack head.”
The Beach
Medabee sat on the bench and waited for the lizard. He knew he wanted to see if a Charmander came by. He hadn’t told Tony Hawk that Charmanders didn’t live in theses parts, he wants to see if it had really been one, or if it was a new breed of lizard.
He looked out to see a goomba running across the sand with something red in it’s mouth.
“Missile Launch!” Medabee yelled, and blow the goomba to kingdom come. He then grabbed the half-eaten lizard. It looked to small to be a charmander, but he decided to send it to Doctor Simpson to decide.
New York
Dr. Donkey Kong looked through the barrels in his lab, checking on the contains. As head of the Tropical Disease Lab of Columbia University, he wanted to make sure all was in order.
Diddy Kong walked in with a small barrel. “ Half eaten lizard here for you.”
“Is this from Homer Simpson’s lab?”
“Yea, but he’s away in prison for Road Rage.”
The opened it up. “Looks like a common infant Charmander.”
“The say it’s biting people in the ass.”
Later that day, Medabee got the fax about the lizard being just a Charamder. He tossed it aside, forgot about it, and robattled pepper cat.
Betty the mushroom was walking down the hall of the castle. She wanted to check on the baby fungi that had been born. She walked in the room, and saw the window open. That wasn’t weird, the windows didn’t shut in the crappy castle.
She looked in, and saw 3 small red lizards perched on the crib. One of them reached down, and carefully took a bite out of the babies ass. Then they lit the body on fire. Betty ran put to them, but when she saw the pile of ash she said screw it and walked out.
The Shape of the Data
Back at Kong’s lab, a tech named Princess Zelda walked in. “oh, who’s kid drew the dinosaur?”
“What?” Kong asked her.
“The dinosaur. My kids draw them all the time.”
“It’s a charmander.”
“No it’s not.”
“Yes it is.”
“Then where is the Nintendo Logo.”
Dr. Kong looked, and sure enough, there wasn’t one there. “It’s not a dinosaur.”
“You have a museum look at it.”
“No, I don’t think so.” And he threw a barrel at her.
“When I get the triforce back, ooohhhhhh, you’ll be sorry.”
7/10/2002 10:32:43 AM
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