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Dino-Life Chapter 6 Currently Electrified
By Mr.Camel
The Adventures of Mr. Camel: Dino-Life
Chapter 6: Currently Electrified
Ben drove the red jeep along the road. Only four more minutes to the rex’s paddock. The mud on the road flew up as the jeep sped down the road. The sun blazed in the morning sky. He twisted around the turn and immediately braked the jeep.
Ben was astonished. The fence was flattened, the outhouse demolished, the tour vans were gone. They had disappeared.
Ben stepped out of the jeep onto the muddy road, his face grim. He walked over to the wreckage of the outhouse.
“Owww,” someone groaned.
Ben looked down at the wreckage.
“Owww,” the voice said again.
Ben continued to stare at the wreckage.
“Is anyone there?” the voice asked.
“Yes,” Ben answered.
“I’m in pain,” the voice said.
“OK.”
“A lot of pain.”
“OK,” Ben continued to stare at the wreckage.
“You are going to help me, right?”
“I can’t fix bathrooms.”
“Lift the wood up.”
Ben lifted some of the wood up and tossed it to the side. The Host lay there, his leg covered in snot.
“EWWW! You have snot on your leg, I’m not touching you!”
“Yes you are,” Host said.
“I am?”
“Yes, you will pick me up and carry me to the jeep.”
“Oh. OK, if you say so,” Ben picked up Host and carried him to the jeep. Ben then walked over to the edge of the cliff. Before he saw anything he heard a deafening roar from the jungle. Then footsteps. Ben ran back to the jeep. The tyrannosaur appeared from the foliage as he climbed into the jeep.
“Holy shit!” Host said.
The tyrannosaur ran closer as the jeep sat and did nothing.
“Go, you fucking idiot!” Host screamed.
“I lost my keys!”
The tyrannosaur walked to the front of the car and stuck its ass in front of the windshield.
“Damn! Just washed it last week!” Ben yelled angrily.
“What? What is it doing?”
“Shitting,” Ben explained as a brown substance erupted from the tyrannosaurs ass. The car was quickly changed from red to brown.
“Yes, I found them!” Ben said, holding the keys up in the air. He put the keys in the ignition and started the jeep. Ben also turned the windshield wipers on.
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NowAndAgain walked out of the dark corridor into the visitor center.
“Shit, where’s Rick?” NowAndAgain said.
NowAndAgain walked through the building to the control room.
“Ah, I lost Rick, might as well turn the power back on,” NowAndAgain said to himself.
He went over to the Main Power Switch and pulled it up. The computers hummed and beeped. He walked to the main computer and waited for it to load. When it was done he logged in and began setting up the power system. Within ten minutes the whole facility had power back.
NowAndAgain stood up, grabbed a jelly doughnut, and walked out the door to see a brown jeep pull up outside of the garage.
********************************************************************************
Yvonne and Totally Kyle were climbing down the tree when they heard the tyrannosaur roar and the jeep start up. Yvonne also thought she had seem a man at the top of the cliff.
That was now ten minutes ago. They were now walking through the jungle.
“Where are we going, dudes?” Totally Kyle asked.
“Back to the building, if we can find it,” Randle answered.
“Do you think that car got away safely?” Yvonne asked.
“I don’t know. But at least the didn’t end up down here.”
“I thought I saw someone up there when the tyrannosaur roared.”
“Probably didn’t make it then.”
“Oh, they made it, dudes. The tyrannosaur only roars like that when he’s constipated. And he doesn’t eat when he’s constipated,” Kyle explained.
“Oh. Well that’s good. And disturbing,” Yvonne said.
“Yeah, they might have, like, gotten a bit messy, but they made it.”
********************************************************************************
AlanGrant5 picked up the ringing telephone. “Hello?”
“Hey, AlanGrant5, this is Dan,” the voice on the other side said.
“Oh. What do you want?”
“To know if you have found the cause and source of the sea monkeys, of course!”
“Oh. Well I think we found it.”
“Yes?”
“Yes.”
“Can I know what it is?”
“No.”
“Why not?”
“Because I’m going to tell you,” AlanGrant5 said.
“But you just said you weren’t going to tell me!”
“Fine, be that way!”
“Just tell me!”
“Fine! It’s a chemical compound made up of two ingredients,” AlanGrant5 finally said.
“What would those ingredients be?”
“NOT TELLING!”
“Why?”
“Fine, it’s half sperm, half alcohol!”
“I find it rather disturbing to think of sperm as an ingredient,” Dan said doubtfully. “Anyway, the source?”
“We’re working on that now.”
********************************************************************************
Rick Arnold continued to walk through the building in darkness. Suddenly a head crab jumped at his face. He struck it with the crowbar knocking it to the side. Rick then jabbed the crowbar into it.
“Little bastard!” Rick said. He looked at the white and red head crab. “What the hell?” Rick just realized the lights were on.
“NowAndAgain!” Rick called and looked back. No one was there.
Rick was suddenly pushed back. An alien zombie stood before him. He jabbed the crowbar into it. The zombie collapsed on Rick, knocking him down. Rick kicked the zombie off of himself and stood up again.
Rick looked down the hall to make sure there were no more zombies or aliens. A few chairs, tables and crates were scattered along the hallway. There was also the body of a dead security guard slumped over a table. Rick walked down the hall, towards the security guard.
“Yes!” Rick said as he picked a 9MM Glock out of the guards hand. He searched the guards pockets and vest to see if he carried any more ammunition.
After thoroughly searching the guard, Rick had twenty-two bullets.
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Mr. Camel and Guilty Spark cautiously approached the shed. Camel opened the door and walked in. Guilty Spark followed.
“Where’s the damned light?” Camel asked.
“Light?” Guilty Spark asked.
“Yeah, there must me a light or some—“ Camel said.
“Or what?” Guilty Spark asked as he walked around the small shed. He then fell into a hole. “OW!”
“It seems we have fallen into a ventilation shaft,” Camel announced.
“Well, which way do we go?” Guilty Spark asked.
“Backward, you lead.”
Guilty Spark began crawling down, until he banged his head against metal. He looked down and saw a large fan.
“Other way!”
“Okay.”
Camel now led them down the ventilation shaft. He stopped and lifted his foot to kick the bars. He noticed a herd of scientists below and decided to wait for them to pass. Three minutes later he kicked the bars out and they jumped down.
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“Mr. Edgar! This is Ben! I have rescued Host. The others were gone. NowAndAgain has turned the power back on!” Ben said, furiously knocking on the door.
“Oh, hell! Can’t even leave a man alone for a few hours these days!” Edgar said, walking out a few minutes later, buttoning and zippering his pants.
“Well, Mr. Edgar, it is very important!” Ben yelled angrily. “It’s your place so you should have to help the people you brought here!”
“Oh, fine! I’m here, what do you need!”
“What do we clean the car with?”
“The car?”
“Yes! The tyrannosaur shat on it!” Ben said.
“What the fuck? Shat? Is shat even a word?”
“Shat, took a shit, what’s the difference?”
“Well for one—“
“What do we clean it with?” Ben demanded.
“Toilet paper!” Edgar took a pack of toilet paper out of his pocket.
“You expect us to clean a tyrannosaur shit covered jeep with toilet paper?”
“Yes, I do.”
Chapter 6 is over. Please comment!
9/3/2003 7:16:31 PM
Comment on this fan fiction!
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