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Dino-Life Chapter 11: A War Begins
By Mr.Camel
The Adventures of Mr. Camel: Dino-Life
Chapter 11: A War Begins
Dark DNA continued to ride on the top of the shark. He clearly saw how the shark had beaten him now. It could move over 1200 MPH!
“Do you have a name?” Dark DNA asked the shark.
“Yes. I am… Seth Rex, the magical sand shark… but most just call me… Seth!” The sand shark answered.
“How do you go so fast?”
“I am magical!”
“Magical?”
“Yes, I am like that dog in The Never Ending Story.”
“Hey, I saw that movie!”
“Yeah, what a stupid movie! Liars! It did end!”
“Um… it had to end sometime,” Dark DNA pointed out. “Can you fly?”
“Well…”
Seth Rex grew long, poofy dog-ears. “Hold on!” Seth yelled. The shark with ears began to ascend into the sky. His speed increased.
Dark DNA smiled excitedly as his hair blew in the wind. He had a firm grip on the ears.
“Are there any other magical sand sharks?” Dark DNA had to shout over the sound of the wind rushing past him.
“Sadly, no. But there are other sand sharks! You can meet my friend when we get back to the desert! He lives there!”
“Really? Are you sure?”
“About what?”
“That there are no other sand sharks.”
“Yes, I am sure. How dare you doubt the magical mental capabilities of… Seth, the magical sand shark!”
“SORRY!!!” Dark DNA apologized.
“You are forgiven,” Seth Rex acknowledged.
The sand shark moved through the blue sky, among the poofy white clouds. They were almost there.
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Yvonne walked into the clearing where the shit fight had taken place. The shit flakes still swirled into a massive funnel shape, but it wasn’t nearly as bad as when she had left. There was still no sign of Dr. Junkee, though.
“Over here! Yvonne, over here!” she heard a voice whisper.
“Where?”
“Under the tree! Come quick! It’s dangerous there!”
“Wha…” Yvonne looked around, looking for the unseen danger.
“Watch out! Watch out!” the voice shouted.
A gooey white blob fell from the sky. Yvonne screamed and dove towards the tree.
A hand grabbed her and pulled her into a ditch dug out under the tree.
“Christ, we totally thought you were going to get hit!” a voice whispered.
“Thank God you’re still alive!” another voice whispered. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah, I’m okay. What was that?” Yvonne said quietly. “And who are you? And why are we whispering?”
“We are Martin and Kyle. Junkee is still unfound,” Martin said. He sighed before continuing. “We are under attack. It’s the pigeons. They want revenge and are unleashing it in the form of a bird shit hurricane. Sometimes they flap their wings really fast and make strong wind gusts. Sometimes they have gas and start tornadoes. The bird feces are like a torrential downpour. The sand on the outsides of the facility, in the desert, is beginning to rise, like waves. Soon I think we may have a tsunami.”
“What does this mean?” Yvonne asked, confused.
“It’s basically an inland hurricane where the rain comes in the form of bird shit, wind is from the flapping of the wings, waves and tsunamis are from sand instead of water, and tornadoes become a threat when bird farts,” Martin explained.
“Well, what do we do now?” Yvonne asked.
“We wait,” Martin said.
“For what?”
“Well, there are three things that could happen,” Martin paused. “One, we leave when the eye of the hurricane reaches us. Two, when the shit cloud dissipates, we look for Junkee. Three, if anyone has a plan on escaping, tell me. It may be our only chance for survival.”
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Edgar and NowAndAgain stood around the computer, watching Ben play games. Host sat on a mattress in the corner, his leg propped up on a pillow.
Thud! Thud! Thud! The sound of bird shit hitting the building echoed inside the room.
“Damn! I lost!” Ben yelled angrily before kicking the computer. It flew off of the desk and smashes against the floor. Black smoke rose up from the wreckage.
“What the hell was that about?” Host laughed.
“It made me angry. I hate losing easy games like solitaire. So I kicked it!” Ben said, angrily.
“Okay, sorry,” Host said. “What’s happening outside?”
“Still a storm,” Edgar said.
“What does my car look like?” Ben asked.
“Shit. It looks like a giant blob of bird shit,” Edgar said. “When this is over, you should enter it into a car show.”
“Fuck you!” Ben yelled, giving Edgar the finger.
“I’m serious!”
“Bring it on, old man!”
“What the hell?”
“Fine, but you’re still a bologna sandwich!”
“Do you know what the hell he’s talking about?”
NowAndAgain shook his head.
“He’s right!” Host yelled. “You damned bologna sandwich!”
“What the fuck is going on?” Edgar thought out loud.
“You’re a fucking bologna sandwich, that’s what!” Ben shouted.
“What makes you think that I am a bologna sandwich?”
“You just are!” Ben shouted.
“Yes, but there are other reasons, too. For one thing, did you notice how cheesy his smile is? God… another thing, have you seen how many sandwiches he’s been eating?”
Everyone looked around the room. There were at least a thousand plates with half eaten sandwiches on them.
“You are what you eat,” Host said.
“Oh my God, he’s right!” NowAndAgain gasped.
They all suddenly raised pitchforks and torches. Edgar began to run. He didn’t know where to run. NowAndAgain blocked the exit to the control room. His only chance was to go outside. But the bird shit was acid; he would die if he went out. An umbrella appeared in his hand. It was black.
“Damn!” Edgar yelled. In his mind, he decided whether he should go outside to open it or open it inside, and ignore the superstition.
The umbrella popped open and Edgar ran outside. Immediately, a swarm of pigeons raced down out of the sky. They covered Edgar and began to eat him. Edgar fell to the ground, screaming in pain as one pigeon pecked his eyes out. The pigeons continued to eat Edgar. He was in deep agony. The pain of being eaten alive was extreme. He just wanted it all to end. He began slipping into the realm of darkness.
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“Okay, men. The damned pigeons have killed our general,” Corporal Aragorn said, pointing to a slumped over body in the corner. Some of the soldiers groaned in disgust.
“Did you have to show us that?” asked Raptor Dude, the platoon’s scout.
“Thank you for your comments, Sergeant Raptor Dude. What I just showed you will now be your dinner,” Aragorn grinned at seeing Raptor Dude run to the bathroom to puke.
“Corporal, should I remove the poisons from his body?” asked Ambrose, the medic.
“Yes, do that now, Ambrose,” Aragorn replied.
Ambrose walked over to carcass of General Evilgrinch and pulled a large needle out of his pocket. The platoon watched with interest as it filled with a light green substance.
“All done, Corporal!” Ambrose returned to the line in which the platoon was standing.
“Very good, Ambrose. Anyway, our objective is to kill those damned pigeons!” Aragorn shouted. “They killed General Evilgrinch, so they deserve to die!”
The soldiers clapped, all except for one. TheRiddler quietly stepped into the bathroom. He pulled out a cell phone.
“Hello?”
“This is Riddler. I have news,” TheRiddler said.
“Okay, this is Punk Nerd. Report news,” the voice on the other end said.
“We are under attack from killer pigeons. The General has been killed so Corporal Aragorn has assumed leadership. He also has changed the mission objective.”
“What is the new objective?” Punk Nerd asked.
“To kill the pigeons.”
“Oh, this could be serious. Is he allowing the other platoons to continue hunting for Mr. Arnold?”
“I don’t know, but probably not.”
“We’ll come soon.”
TheRiddler was doing his job well. He was a Black Ops member sent to spy on the marines. If they did anything wrong, he was to report it immediately. He walked out of the bathroom.
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“AHHH!!!!!” Edgar screamed in the night. He woke up. He poked his eyes.
“Ow.” Edgar said, removing his fingers from his eyes. His eyes remained in their sockets. He felt his body. It was there. He was still alive.
Edgar sighed with relief. I’m going to have to slow down on those sandwiches, Edgar thought. He lay back down, drifting into sleep.
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Seth Rex, the magical sand shark, began to descend. The shark drifted down out of the clouds. As they got closer to the ground, Dark DNA could see TobyCompy. He lay on the ground, asleep and snoring. Racing toward him was a shark fin.
“Oh no! That shark is going to eat TobyCompy!” Dark DNA screamed.
“No he won’t. That’s Jango Raptor, my friend. He is not a magical sand shark, but he is very strong and smart,” Seth said.
Seth landed and the poofy ears vanished. Dark DNA jumped off and raced towards his friend. Dark DNA poked TobyCompy several times before he woke up.
“Oh no! The panda farts have come to take me!” TobyCompy screamed as he woke up.
“No, it’s just me!” Dark DNA laughed.
“Oh God, even worse!” TobyCompy opened his eyes.
“I would like to introduce you two to Jango Raptor!” Seth said.
TobyCompy and Dark DNA shook Jango’s fin.
“Okay, the reason we have gathered here is to do something!” Seth yelled.
“What may that something be?” TobyCompy asked.
“We are going to defeat these pigeons!” Seth said.
“But why would two sand sharks be interested in defeating an army of pigeons?”
“Mostly food. But some other reasons are:
Shitting all over everything is disgusting.
We are hungry.
We are bored.
And mostly… because we can!”
“You forgot one,” Jango Raptor reminded him. “We are rivals of these pigeons!”
“Why?” TobyCompy asked.
“It’s a long story, but here it goes…”
==##==
Chapter 11 is over
Thanks for reading,
Please comment!
9/28/2003 2:38:51 PM
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