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2002 Oscar Awards
By Dino Digger
Reporter: Hi we are here at the 74th annual Oscar Awards and the movie that is nominated for the most awards is obviously Jurassic Park 3. Now to the stage where the show is just now beggining.
Host: ok, the nominations for Best Picture are Jurassic Park, Lord of the Rings, and Planet of the Apes.
Opens the envelope.
Host: and the winner is...Planet of the Apes.
Joe Johnston: What! I worked hard for that nomination. Everybody jack the winners!
Sam Neill jumps up and sticks Mark Wallburg in the jaw. Helena Bonham Carter elbows Laura Dern in the face. Laura pulls her wig off and throws it into the crowd. William H. Macy and Tea Leoni start to double team the award hander and they jack them up then run off into the crowd with the award. Everybody then sits down.
Host: ok, now the next award is for best sound affects and the nominees are Jurassic Park 3, Tomb Raider, and Harry Potter
Opens the envelope.
Host: and the winner is...Harry Potter
As Danielle Radcliff runs up to get the award Johnston trips him. Laura Dern comes up and kickes him in the ribs repeatedly.
Host: now I do not think it is right to beat up on little kids
The cast of Jurassic Park 3 looks up at the host and then at each other than back at the host again. They all charge at the host and dog pile him. They all start to take off there shoe and start to beat him. Macy once again steals the trophy and runs off with it.
Host: ok, please calm down people, no more out brakes, please, its bad for the publicity.
Everybody sits down in there seats,
Host: the next award is for the best movie of the century. The nominees are Jurassic Park 3. And that seems to be all. Joe Johnston seems to have tampered with the nominations! And the winner without a doubt is...
Opens the envelope.
Host: Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon!
Sam Niell: this is outrageous! Call in the backup
The back round cast for Jurassic Park 3 come flying down from the ceiling on ropes and they start fighting with the cast of Crouching Tiger hidden dragon. It was street fighting verse karate. The police came storming in through the door and arrested everybody in the place. They are all thrown into jail. But while the cast spends a little time in jail they all plot there revenge...
4/13/2002 8:27:45 AM
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