|
Jurassic Pork , Part 3
By Dino-Snore
SOMEWHERE BETWEEN NOODLE ISLAND AND THE MAINLAND
SATURDAY
( A Lone Helicopter , Not counting the 2 Cam. Choppers following , is flying over the sea , in the Passenger Section , TR112 , JPAC , JP3G , are facing 2 People , Goldmember , a Vamplawyer , and a Mathamagician named Stealth Raptor2 )
SR2 : So , Uh , You , uh , dig , uh , up , uh , Dinosnores ? Uh......
JPAC : Yeah.....Whatever.....
TR112 : You'll have to excuse Dr. SR2 , He has a Case of " Guygettinghurtalitus " Happened in everyone of the Stories with him in them , Ask Dino-Snore !
JPAC : Ohhh......
SR2 : I'm not only a Mathamgician , I'm also a Crapitician.....I study Crap-Theory ! Stuff like Shape-Shifting Errors , Zombies , Space-Squids , Cockroach Monsters , and Indestructable Aliens from the Face of Planet X ! Anone know about them ? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA !
TR112 ( Pointing a Gold ) : I brought Nerds , you brought a Goth ! ( He looks out the side window ) we're herrrreeee.......
( The Chopper is Traveling SIDEWAYS to the Island , it flies over some rocks , over a beach , over a forrest , past a Movie Theature , and into a Jungle , the vines get all caught in the Rotors ,forcing the Chopper to go up and down , inside the Chopper , Gold and SR2 Strap in , JPAC finds only Seat Buckles , pulls out his trusty Laser and melts the ends together...... The Chopper lands next to 2 Jeep Stranglers , and somehow , SR2 has switched places with JPAC and JP3G , a Guy walks up to the Chopper , moons whoever's Reading this , and opens the door , letting the passengers out , they walk up to the Jeeps , which Pulls up , and some guy gets out , he accidently slams the door into the Camera , and all we see before the camera breaks is " DURASTIC PARKA "...... )
( The 2 Jeeps are driving along a road , there are all these bushes along the road , not to mention a lo out Porta-Potties..... JP3G reaches out of the Lead Car and grabs a Leaf off a Tree , In the Back Car , Gold and TR112 are talking )
Gold : BLEH ! Are the fences built ?
TR112 ( Putting on a Garlic Neck-tie ) : Yeah , and the Moats , and the Motion Sensors , not to mention Censors that take out every Bleepin' Thing You are not supposed to say !
Gold : Okay , this is Not a Weekend Excursion , this a Silly Investigation of the Island , if the Investors , who I represent , are not impressed , will shut you down , and I'll Suck your Blood !
( TR112 holds a Cross up to Gold )
TR112 : THE POWER OF CHRIST COMPEL---- Ah.....Forget it.....
( TR112 tosses the cross out of the car , a Clawy-Hand emerges from the Jungle and snatches it.... )
( Up ahead , Both Jeeps suddenly stop , SR2 swears as his Face is slammed into JP3G's Seat , JP3G has a rash from that Leaf she's Holding , and she's Sneezing..... )
JP3G : Well...Sneeze...It dosent look like it belongs here...it SHOULD NOT BE HERE !...Sneeze
( JPAC looks up , and screams as a Dinosnore eats the tree above his head , t's a Breakablesaurus , one of the Most Hungriest Dinosnores on the Island , JPAC , JP3G , and TR112 get out of thier cars and head towards it )
JPAC : Hmmm.....
SR2 ( In the Jeep ): WHAT , uh , THE , uh , HECK ? Uh , How , uh , did , uh , that , uh , get , uh , there ?
TR112 : We Clocked the T-Wrecks at 32 Miles per Year....
JPAC and JP3G : YOU HAVE A T-WRECKS ??!?!
( JPAC throws up , he looks off in the distance and sees both Breakablesaurus and Paratrooperphilosopherus Class Dinosnores at a Nearby Lake )
JPAC : HOW DID YOU DO THIS ( He grabs TR112's Collar ) ANSWER ME ! ( He shakes TR112 around )
TR112 : OKAY , OKAY , I'LL SHOW YOU !
LATER......
( The 2 Jeeps drive up to the Visitor Center , The Group exit both Vehicles and go inside , theres a Skeleton of a Breakablesaurus Strangling a Skeleton of a Taibaoasaurus Wrecks )
TR112 : WE SPARED NO EXPENSE ! Everyone has rides , you'll like this place , I like Dinosnores , lets go upstairs and Get the Full Treatment !
( They go up the stairs )
JP3G : So what do you think this Place Smells like ?
JPAC : Smells like I'm out of work.....
SR2 : Dont , uh , you , uh , mean , uh , Stinky ?
( They go into a Corridor on the 2nd Level and enter a theatre room , they all take seats except for TR112 , we walks up to the screen , a Video TR112 appears....)
Video : HELLO !
Group : Uh.....hello.....
TR112 : How are you ?
Video : Fine ! Why ?
TR112 : THIS !
( TR112 pulls out a Knife and stabs the Video through the screen , the Video falls over dead , suddenly , a Blood-Soaked Cartoon emerged fron the Body )
Cartoon : HELLO , I'M MISTER BLOOD ! I'M GONNA KILL YOU !
Group : Uh huh.....
Mr. Blood : YEAH , RIGHT ! I'M GONNA CUT YOU UP , STEAL YOUR BLOOD , HARVEST IT IINTO MY DNA !
( The Screen Shows a Guy drilling into a " Fake Fly in a Ice Cube " )
Mr. Blood : HAH , LETS BEGIN THE TOUR !
Group : AGH !
( They try to get out , but Seatbelts materialize and hold them in place , the Screen moves off to the side and they now see a lab , In the Center pf the room is door marked " COLD STORAGE , PLOT POINTS ONLY " This Door is important Later..... )
TR112 : You can see RaptorVinny , my Chief Scientist ( Ppinting at a Guy at a Comoputer ) HEY VINNY !
( RV500 Waves at The Group )
Gold : Are thes...Auto...Eruotica ?
TR112 : Pervert !
( Meanwhile , JPAC , JP3G , and SR2 fight thier way out fo thier Seat Belts , TR112 just presses a Button..... The Group all enter the Lab and go up to RV500 )
RV500 : Hey ! We got one hatching today !
( He points at a Egg , it's Shaking , the Egg Explodes , and a Butt-Ugly Dinosnore lands on JPAC's Face )
JPAC : AHHGGG !
( JPAC starts to punch himself , bash himself , and beat himself to get the Dinosnore off his face.....,but he's hurting himself more than it , finally , it gets off )
SR2 : You know...Dinosnores Cannot be contained , they can crash through Fences and Walls , all during the night when it's raining........They're All Female Right ? Well , he nready for a Sex Change !
JPAC : What Class is this ?
RV500 : ( Looking up from his Wallet ) : A Velcrocraptor !
JPAC : You breed Craptors ?
RV500 : DUH ! Now I gotta go home , because I'm afraid that SR2 over heasr is gonna be telling the truth about his Crap-Theory !
( He puts his Stuff , the Baby Craptor , and his Clothes into his Briefcase and leaves.... )
9/20/2002 10:04:45 PM
Comment on this fan fiction!
|
|
|
