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DAN’S JP3 PAGE SUPER FRIENDS: The List
By Mr. Chaos
Voice over guy- They were once a bunch of board members. That is, until a nuke hit the site, and turned them into DAN’S JP3 PAGE SUPER FRIENDS. We see our heroes at NVO’s place, helping him look for something important.
(Cut to a messy apartment, NVO tearing the place up while Chaos, Carna and Maester look on.)
NVO- Have to find it, have to find it.
Chaos- You know, this would be easier if you told us what we were looking for.
Maester- Yea, what is so important that you had to drag us over here, tell us to help you find something, then not tell us what it is.
NVO- None of your business
Carna (holding up a box marked Dan’s New Message Board)- This it?
NVO- Nope, that’s something I found while going through Dan’s trash a few years back.
Chaos- You know what. I’m about ready to kick your ass if you don’t tell us what to look for!
NVO- Ya, at least my fan fics get positive remarks!
Chaos- Oh, that’s it!
(Chaos and NVO walk right at each other, but Maester and Carna restrain them)
Carna- Knock it off, both of you. If you think we’re going to try and find your teeth after you two fight, your mistaken.
Maester- We have enough trouble trying to find NVO’s mysterious idem.
NVO- I’m going to get the mail. (walks out)
Chaos- I hate him so much.
Maester- Hate is such a strong word.
Chaos- Fine, I don’t hate him, I loathe him with every fiber of my being
Maester- That’s better.
(NVO returns looking pale, a package in his hands)
Carna- What the hell is wrong with you?
NVO- This. (holds up a piece of paper)
Maester- Oh, you discovered paper. Let me call the reporters, we’ll have to get this on the evening news
NVO_ Oh just go work on your Geeks fan fic, will ya.
Carna- Well, what the hell is it.
NVO- It’s a note. A gang has taken my idiot list. They want 5o million dollars for it’s safe return.
Chaos- Are you saying you made us search all afternoon, just for your idiots list!
NVO- Yes
Maester- Chaos, You grab him, Carna, open the window.
NVO- Wait, let me explain. My idiots list is a dangerous thing. I have people on there that could do a lot of harm to me.
Carna- Sooooooo…..?
NVO-If they were to publish it, I wouldn’t be able to show my face on the board again!
Chaos- So, I guess you want us to find these guys and then help you kill them?
NVO-Yes?
Carna- Open the window.
(later, in the Super Friends secret command center.)
Batcartna- So, how are we going to figure out who sent the note?
Spider Maester- Well, we are running a DNA tests on the paper to determine who sent it. The results should be in any second
(a machine dings, Spider Maester walks up to it)
Spider Maester- According to the computer, you can’t find DNA on a fax.
Chaotic- Well, that was a waste of 11 hours. (walks over to the mini bar)
Super NVO- What are you doing!
Chaotic- Giving up.
Batcarna- We don’t give up.
Chaotic- Sure we do. Remember when we couldn’t get that little girl out of the well, we gave up then.
Spider Maester- That’s because you threw your sword at her because she wouldn’t stop crying
Chaotic- So?
Batcarna- You gut her like a fish!
Chaotic- She wasn’t that cute of a kid anyway.
Super NVO- Can we please get back to my list
Spider Maester- My List, My List, My List.
Batcarna- Well Super NVO, I do have an idea how to figure out who wrote this, but I was saving it as a last resort
Super NVO- Just do it.
(later that day)
Batcarna- Well TyranoRex, can you see who wrote it?
TyranoRex114- Yes, if you look at spelling of ransom, you will notice an extra o. His is a common thing done by the Rancor gang.
Super NVO- Rancor Gang?
Chaotic- A group of spammers that stole the original rancor’s name.
Super NVO- Come to think of it, I did put their names on the list.
Batcarna- Then lets go.
(the hero walk toward their vehicles)
Chaotic- I don’t know why we don’t use him more often.
Spider Maester- Because when he sees bad spelling, he, well
Tyrano- Two o’s how stupid. That makes me so mad…
(Tyrano begins to turn into the Incredible Tyrano)
Chaotic- Ok, now I understand.
(run to their vehicles)
Tyrano- Must stop people who don’t spell right!!!!!!
Voice over guys- Later that night, our heroes prepare to trap the Rancor gang in a trap.
Batcarna (dressed as a bum)- Does everyone understand the plan?
Spider Maester (dressed as a construction worker)- Yea, we wait for Super NVO to give the Gang the money, then we attack.
Batcarna- Ok, everyone ready, uh, chaotic, where are you?
Chaotic (hiding in an alley)- I am not wearing this
Super NVO- Come on you big baby.
Chaotic (dressed as a hooker)- This can’t get any worse
(Dan walks up to Chaotic)
Dan- Hey, they hired me to pimp you out tonight.
Chaotic- It got worse, didn’t it?
Spider Maester- Yea
Super NVO- Everyone to positions, they are coming.
(Rancor gang walks up to Super NVO)
Rancor 1- Ok, where is the money man?
Super NVO (pats briefcase.)- Right here
Rancor 2- Let me count it
(Dan and Chaotic watch nervously, Dan’s hand reaches down)
Chaotic- I don’t care if you are suppose to be my pimp, touch me there and you die.
Rancor 3- Ok, here is the list.
Super NVO- thank you very NOW!
(heroes spring out, attack Rancors)
Chaotic- Time to get out of this dress (slices dress off, revealing costume.) Much better
(Heroes continue to attack Rancors, but once they kill on, another takes it’s place)
Spider Maester- We can’t win, there are to many of them (fires a web, but to exhausted to pull it.)
Chaotic- We have only one chance. (hollers to Rancors) I give up
Batcarna- Just like the little girl in the well story.
Rancor 1121- good. Do you have any last requests?
Chaotic- Yes, could you write my name on the wall over there?
Rancor 2345- Sure. (Begin to write Chatic on the wall)
Rancor 4532- Anything else?
Chaotic- Yea, kiss your asses goodbye.
Rancor 7890- Huh?
(hear a roar. Incredible Tyrano appears on the scene.)
Tyrano- You spell wrong! I must kill you
Chaotic- Come on guys, lets get out of.. Super NVO, stop righting people on your idiot list!
Super NVO- Hehe, sorry.
(Back at Mr. Chaos’ mansion)
Chaos- Well, I am glad that is over.
NVO (hugging his idiots list)- Yea, me too
Carna- So tell me. Are any of us on the list
NVO- That is not of your business
Maester- Yea, NVO is right, it’s none of our (grabs list out of NVO’s hands, looks at it.) Wait a minute, Vader, Evilgrinch, yourself. You idiot, this is your cool people list
NVO- Then I guess I must have put the idiot list where I put the cool people list. Here it is.
Chaos- You mean it was here the entire time!
NVO- Yea, I guess it was
Carna (looking at the list)- Hey, we’re not on the cool people list!
Chaos (grabbing NVO) – Move it, I’m throwing him out the window
Maester- But the window isn’t open!
Chaos- I know.
Voice over guy- Will Chaos forgive NVO? Will TyranoRex114 be the next super friend? Will Maester ever make another Geek Fan fic? Will Chaos’ fan fics ever get a positive review? Find out next time!
7/18/2002 10:28:07 AM
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