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A sad part of the tale was the death scene. It is a shock to find out how close the two mercenaries were.
The Malcolm thing is magnificent, literally magnificent, i love it how he forms his own plan rather then Bradfords, when it goes awry.
By the way the pic at the end was well put there as i had no idea what that dino was.
~Dark Hunter
At 2:11:29 AM on 2/8/2003, Strider_Aragorn said:
Moremoremoremore
more
WHat's Cross' problem? Tim! Yay! Masiakasaurus ... hmmm ... what a weird lookin creature ... Tim's back! And the plot thickens ...
At 5:32:06 PM on 2/6/2003, Crisco said:
i agree u are getting better evry time, this fanfic is what i look forward to every time i get online, i know u probably mean for Cross to die, and it sounds reasonable, but just for that reason it'd be interested if she survived, either way i cant wait to see her interact with Grant, these are the best new characters ive ever read
At 1:19:50 AM on 2/6/2003, drucifer67 said:
Ms. Cross is sort of bitter, isn't she? Or as young master Murphy puts it...she has "issues" :)
Carlisle had to go. People hesitate to kill a character they really like, so I had to prove to myself that I had the stomach for it...I'm going to miss that hick.
And I had to generate some feelings for Rick. I started out with the intent of making him likeable by the end of the story, and I knew he had a long way to go :)
Malcolm and Bradford...where IS that story going? I guess I'd better figure that out soon LOL Okay, seriously, I've got a plan for those two--but you'll just have to wait and see ;)
Thanks again for all the positive comments...hope I can continue to write well enough to get more of this awesome feedback...
Stay tuned!
At 1:05:10 AM on 2/6/2003, yvonne said:
First things first. Lindsay Cross is not a nice person. lol. I cannot wait to see more interaction between her and Alan. And I found it totally entertaining, that when Alan finally had a chance to speak ... he said nothing. lol.
Carlisle dying was kind of shocking, and it also worked very well in showing that Rick is, indeed, human ... with emotions. Great job with that whole sequence. It was suspenseful, as well.
What the heck is going on with Malcolm (or should I say Joe) and Bradford? I'm with JPJunkee ... I don't know where that part of the story is going either. Can't wait to find out. :)
Tim and Lex reuniting was good, too, as well as showing that Alan is getting weaker. Lex trying to talk him into leaving the island was a show of really good dialogue.
Overall, though, the dialogue is wonderful. I am just loving this story! :)
At 12:56:50 AM on 2/6/2003, JPJunkee said:
do not like Cross. She will be eaten by something of great mass, I demand it!
And now Carlisle is dead. . . . just when I was starting to like him. You've made me feel sad for him and Rick, dang you! . . . . but congrats as an author.
I liked that you included that dino, it was an odd dinosaur, and I've never heard of it, which made it a cool scene.
And now Tim is part of the team. . . . I wonder what will happen with him and Cross now involved?
But, by far, still my favorite part of the story, was the Bradford/Malcolm story. The reason I like it so much, is because I like your adaptation of Ian, and also; I have no clue where this story is going! I want to find out though!
I look forward to more!
-- JPJunkee
At 12:52:57 AM on 2/6/2003, drucifer67 said:
"How big a boy are ya?" LOL
Oh yeah...I know Roy D.'s work well :)
It always makes me happy to hear that the dialogue stands out, since that's where I tend to focus most of my energy...
Thanks for the praises, Vader...stay tuned!
At 12:25:03 AM on 2/6/2003, Vader said:
Great chapter! You're getting better and better with the dialogue each chapter - its always consistently realistic.
Sid totally reminds me of Roy D. Mercer (if you don't know who that is, look it up on Kazaa and listen to his prank phone calls, he he).
Anyways, I really enjoyed reading the chapter. Good work, keep it up. :)
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