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Keep a-readin', Shniz. All will be revealed soon enough.
-H
At 12:48:55 PM on 8/20/2004, The_Shniz said:
I'm actually looking forward to what happens with Joggins. It seems like he was next in line and could develop a grudge towards Davies or something.
Anyways, it's looking great.
At 2:55:03 AM on 8/20/2004, The Host said:
Oh, and the other reason why I go into so much detail, particularly in some of the early scenes, is because I want them to be very slow-moving -- I'm trying to nail pacing and want a steady build-up over two and a half hours. To that end I've packed in extra description so that the page-to-minute ratio remains more or less intact, since something that could be described in a single sentence might be meant to take half a minute of film.
-The Host
At 2:52:01 AM on 8/20/2004, The Host said:
Thanks for the comments, folks! I'm glad to read your comments, Junkee. You were one of the two major reasons I kept posting the original fic, and I really hope you'll like this one. As for the other reason . . . Well, I'm sure Dark Hunter will be around soon enough.
Just to address a couple of points you raise . . . Well, Dawson, though dead, will continue to have a major impact on events as they unfold. To see what I mean you'll have to wait for a few chapters. As for the writing style: that was deliberate. I still see this as a movie, not a novel; and, to be honest, I probably don't have the patience to write an entire novel. Nonetheless, I want to try to make this screenplay a little more literary and interesting than your standard Hollywood script. Though I'd love to see it on the screen someday, I figure it will likely only be read. Finally, I feel that I can portray some feelings better, and more efficiently, if I portray them obtusely. So in the case of the description of Davies's room, by writing it from his POV I was able to describe both the room itself and his reaction to it in the same sentence, while remaining amorphous enough to allow a director other than myself leeway in interpretation.
Anyway, that's my story and I'm stickin' to it. Hope you enjoy the rest of the screenplay!
Cheers,
The Host
At 2:06:13 AM on 8/20/2004, JPJunkee said:
Well, since hearing that there would be a sequel to Triumvirate, I've been eager to read it. And now about a year later, after reading this first chapter, I was surprised with how it started. . . . Dawson's already dead. That's the part that threw me, since I expected he'd be at least seen before croaking (or is he not dead? But only kind of dead? Or something? . . . Is he going to get better? hehe). But anyway! Some good stuff here. Realistic dialogue. And some nice detailed descriptions of the surroundings and scenes.
Some of the details and stuff that made their way into the script aren't things you'd usually find in scripts. Some of it is simply more wordy than what scripts usually are (but you're The Host, you're the living thesaurus, I have to expect big words from you), and sometimes it was almost as if character's thoughts made their way into the narrative. An example of what I'm talking about, is the way Davies's room is described. You're doing more than showing the actions and environments, you're also adding some character to the narrative. Which makes me think this would possibly be better as a novel, not a screenplay. It still works this way, though. Almost makes it just a little bit easier to read than a normal script would be.
But anyway, you're off to a pretty good start. Davies being the Emperor should be interesting. And I liked how he woke up with the nightmares of Johnson, that was pretty cool. I'm interested to see where this leads.
At 8:13:13 PM on 8/19/2004, Stealth Raptor2 said:
I read it last night, and I enjoyed this very much. I'm gonna read part 2 in a little bit.
At 5:03:42 PM on 8/19/2004, TyrannoRex112 said:
I read your summary of the first, really enjoyed it, and decided to just read this before I trully read all of the first Triumvirate.
This first part was very good, and you are a very talented writer. I'm interested to see how Davies plays out as Emperor. Looking forward to more, Host.
At 2:38:40 AM on 8/19/2004, The Host said:
Thanks for the comments, guys! You might have to look hard to find any eloquence in this, Teach, but I'll do my best. :-) And I've heard a lot of people make the same comment, that it's difficult to read a screenplay. Perhaps it depends on taste, or the way one conceptualizes. Me, I'm a very visual person, and prone to daydreaming, which makes the script format ideal reading -- I take my time amnd try to imagine what angles the director would choose, what lighting, what sets. I try to let it play before me on-screen.
With that in mind, I reeeeally wish I'd meet a talented artist with loads of time on his hands -- I'd like nothing more than to be able to storyboard this film or the previous one. All interested can send applications to mattboudreau@syd.eastlink.ca.
Cheers and thanks again,
The Host
At 12:56:56 AM on 8/19/2004, Chavez said:
Read it and for the most part enjoyed it. I am interested to see where you take this sequel.
At 10:02:41 PM on 8/18/2004, Teach said:
Off to an interesting start...and that's what counts most, is it not?
I like the reality of these characters. Although I can't really 'feel' them on a personal level, the dialogue and the descriptive details bring them to life.
I wish I understood why I can never focus on a screenplay. I tend to skip from dialogue to dialogue (I'm told that major players in the film industry do the same)...but I am forcing myself to go through this thoroughly, because I don't want to miss a single eloquent word...
Kudos to you for finally getting part two off the ground. Looking forward to more.
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