|
|
[ Log In ] [ Register ]
 means the user is online now!
Nice Rez.
At 12:16:54 PM on 12/13/2007, RezBan! said:
My name is Dan Suarez, and I’m here to talk to all of you about Chivalry.
The Question is, is Chivalry Dead?
The answer is no, it’s just shot and bleeding out slowly on the side of the road.
Remember that Mel Gibson movie from a few years ago called What Women Want? I know I don’t, but the title alone makes me laugh. How could they make a movie about a man knowing what women want when women don’t even know themselves?
I’m conflicted. On one hand, there is the way of chivalry. The other, equality. The problem is that all I keep hearing is women asking for both. Unfortunately, they are the exact opposite. Chivalry asks for special treatment, equality obviously does not.
Should women be treated specifically? If my answer were to be aligned with all my other views, it would be no. But what about manners? I find myself naturally inclined to give extra sensabilities to women. I might offer my coat to a lady who’s cold, but how would a man react to such an offer? Probably not too well. He might think I’m pitching for the catcher, if you know what I mean.
The modern interpretation of chivalry (which is actually a meshing of medievil ideals of chivalry and courtly love) deals with men’s ettiquette and politeness towards women. Part of the reason we’ve seen a decline in this behavior is because American socitey in general is moving away from the traditional/old-fashioned forms of ettiquette and politeness. Manners just aren’t held to be as important as they once were, and so less and less men are raised to treat women in a chivalrous way.
Chivalry is also caught up in sex and courtship. Another reason for the decline in modern chivalry is the “nice-guys-finish-last” mentality that I know a lot of men subscribe to. The common complaint of “why do the jerks get all the guys?” makes a lot of the nicer guys jaded towards what they know to be the correct way to treat ladies. To be blunt, if you ain’t getting laid or loved, what’s the point?
I hold the door for everyone. If my friend was cold, I’d give them my coat regardless of gender. But then again, they know me well enough(hopefully) to understand that I’m not making a pass at them. When I’m out to dinner with a girl, I’ll offer to pick up the check, but won’t be offended if she wanted to go Dutch, and I wouldn’t be dissapointed if she didn’t offer to pay. The politeness and courtship of chivalry don’t demean or belittle anyone, they formalize and enhance the way we interact.
So it comes down to a choice: chivalry vs. equality.
The first choice is a lot more romantic and adds some magic to life for those who embrace it. It also robs women of a little dignity, I think. It’s almost demeaning to think that women would need your damn coat, anyway.
The second view is a dull, but more realistic and fair. If I were historically a second class citizen (and I’m trying to avoid writing “If I were a woman...”), I would sure want to be seen on a level equal to those around me.
One thing’s for sure, having both chivalry and equality in play warps the social dynamic, and is no way to run a railroad. Getting off the fence and picking one way or the other is the only way to go.
Scott Farrell of Chivalry Today organization.
Dave Chappelle Killin’ Them Softly
Various Online Dating “Tips” programs
At 7:47:49 PM on 8/13/2007, Dac said:
Oh, and Australia is simultaneously an island, country and continent
At 7:46:57 PM on 8/13/2007, Dac said:
You are Chef Brian.
Sorry, you must be logged in to post a comment
|
|
Add DJP3P to your newsreader!
|
